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When we moved to Hawaii, Nick and I had been married for 5 days. We had just spent 5 years living apart from each other, on opposite coasts of the country. Nick had gone on 5 deployments during that time (I just realized that maybe 5 is my lucky number?). He had gotten back from a deployment a few weeks before our wedding. I quit my job, finished my Masters degree, and was about to move 5,000 miles from the only home I had ever known.
There were so many changes happening all at once. I was overwhelmed, nervous, and the most excited I had ever been in my life.
I was about to embark on the greatest adventure of my life. Starting our marriage in Hawaii changed me in ways that I probably don’t even know. But a few things are certain.
1. Hawaii taught me how to appreciate the simple things. Sunrises. The sound of the ocean. Fresh fruit. A cup of coffee with a friend. The things I loved most about Hawaii turned out to be life’s simplest things. Even though I don’t live in Hawaii anymore, I find myself looking for and appreciating the small, simple things in life more than ever.
2. Hawaii taught me how to slow down. Island time is a real thing. As a born-and-raised New Yorker, I was either going to learn how to slow down or I was going to be very cranky when things didn’t go my way. I’m glad I chose to slow down and I know that my new attitude is here to stay. Now I love nothing more than a long, leisurely cup of coffee with good company.
3. Hawaii taught me to be present. This goes along with slowing down. When you are exploring beautiful waterfalls, hiking on the coast, or when you come across a Hawaiian green sea turtle at the beach, you want to soak up every single second of it. You immediately learn how to be present. Hawaii taught me how to just relax and enjoy a moment for what it is. Then, obviously, you take a picture:
4. Hawaii taught me what really matters in life. My husband. Family. Friendships. Lots of love. And good food. Being far away from home taught me to be with and appreciate the people you love whenever and wherever you can.
5. Hawaii taught me that I can do anything. I hiked big mountains. And then I hiked even bigger ones. I taught myself how to cook and only burned myself a couple of times. I learned how to be independent. While the very idea of being a military spouse used to frighten me, in Hawaii, I learned how to believe in myself. Now I know that I totally got this.
6. Hawaii taught me a lot about marriage. After 5 years of being in a long distance relationship, we needed that time together. We developed our little routines, learned so much about each other, and laughed every day. In Hawaii, I learned how important it is to have quality time with your significant other, no matter how busy life gets. It’s easy to go through the motions, to get-up-go-your-separate-ways-for-the-day-come-home-eat-dinner-watch-tv-go-to-sleep-wake-up-repeat, but you and your significant other need spontaneous Wednesday night dates, evening walks, weekend adventures, nights where you stay up till all hours talking, and romantic dinners at home. Just the two of you. No matter how busy life gets. With so much do to in Hawaii, we never ran out of date ideas. Having regular dates is something I want to continue to do no matter where we live.
7. Hawaii taught me how to be a good friend. I wrote this post a few weeks ago about how important it is to nurture friendships. I learned all of that in Hawaii. Being separated from many of my friends, I realized how important it is to put work into those relationships. When life gets busy, I think that friendships often become last priority. We need to work to make sure that doesn’t happen.
Linking up with with Angie, Jessi, Emma, and Andrea today! This month’s linkup topic is “Your Greatest Adventure.” Head on over to any of their blogs to join in the fun and find some awesome bloggers.
-Carolann
I can imagine that Hawaii was a great adventure and sounds extremely different to New York!
Oh it was! I love both though in their own ways though! Hawaii was amazing but New York will always be home.
Hawaii sounds like it made you so much stronger!
Thanks Emma. I think and hope it did too 🙂
How wonderful to slow down and enjoy life.
It’s so hard sometimes, but I also think it’s so important!
Wow, that is such a big adventure especially after 5 years of living apart. But Hawaii sounds like the most amazing place to start a marriage 🙂
Thanks, Marcella! It was a HUGE change, but for the better, I think!!
Love this! Hawaii is definitely looking more and more appealing each day! Between the crap weather here in MD and the posts I’ve been seeing from you and other bloggers … I’d like to move there now please!
There are a TON of military in Hawaii, Jenn! You might just get the chance! The only thing I didn’t love about Hawaii was how far away it is from the mainland, but it was an incredible experience and I loved every minute of it. If you get the chance I think you would love it too.
Does that mean you’ll be having 5 children?! 😉
Who knows?! 😉
We visited Hawaii last year for our 5 year anniversary (again with the 5’s!), and one of our favorite things was being able to watch the sunsets every night. It truly made us appreciate the little things. I also love you thought on having something spontaneous every now and again in your relationship. It’s so easy to get caught up in the day to day routine.
I agree Ashley! It doesn’t have to be anything major! But some nights you just need to go out for a walk or say forget cooking dinner and go out! I’m so glad you got to go to Hawaii – it is such a special place.
I can relate to a lot of these through living abroad and travelling away from family and friends. Hawaii looks amazing.
I think that living away from home and traveling changes you in many way. I am really glad I had the experience. I cherish my family even more now!
Island is most definitely a real thing! Sounds like Hawaii was good for you x
Thanks, Frankie. I think it was just what I needed!
What a sweet post! I love that you embraced your time in Hawaii so much and that you have nothing but smiles to reflect on! On to the next adventure!
Thanks! I’m loving being in Connecticut and I’m excited to see whatever comes next!
Oh maan, Hawaii sounds incredible. I was going to move there for a couple of months later this year so I could learn to surf but think I’ve leant in the direction of travelling South America… Now I’m rethinking again!
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Oh wow Ellie! Looks like you have a big decision to make! I’m sure either one will be amazing and I can’t wait to see what you end up doing. I’ve never been to South America but it’s on my list!
Wow, those are such beautiful lessons! I especially love the slowing down and being present. What a wonderful time you’ve had there 🙂
Thanks so much Jessi! It was an incredible experience, it still feels like a dream sometimes. It’s so hard to slow down sometimes especially for us bloggers because we always want to do a million things and take a ton of pictures but I think it’s so important!
Love this!! Gorgeous post. You always learn so much as an expat, and you’ve summarised it all beautifully.
Polly xx
Thanks Polly! I never could have imagined how living so far away from home could change me in so many different ways. All for the better, I think. I’ve been following along you pregnancy posts and I am so excited for you! I can’t wait to “meet” your littler girl and read along with your journey as an expat mum!
Every new post you write about Hawaii makes me want to visit even more! Sounds like the perfect place to switch off from the world, get back to basics and enjoy the simple things in life!
Sophie 🙂
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